• Alyssa Piperis

Thought of the Day: Healthy love is work you don't feel forced to do.


When I refer to love as work I’m not saying that loving someone is hard, because it’s not. In fact, it can be frighteningly easy. Every day, people fall in love before they have a real choice in the matter, and before they know how to properly love. The work I’m referring to is the work on ourselves that makes it possible to love someone else in a healthy way. We have to sort through and unpack our baggage and past trauma and insecurities so we can accept them and tackle them. The more we acknowledge who we are and own who we are, the better we’re able to accept others for who they are and help them grow. That isn’t to say we should see others as a project. No. That’s a dangerous route to take. But at the end of the day, we all have work to do, and that work never stops. So long as we’re human, there’s work to be done. On ourselves. For others. For the planet. For equality. For justice. For the world. For love. In life, work can be a necessary evil or a welcome challenge. For a 13-year-old with a backpack full of homework, “work” is probably seen more as a necessary evil. But when it comes to things like a career and love, work should be a welcome challenge. We should want to do the work and feel confident in what and who we’re working towards and alongside. Both these things—a career and love—should be acted upon with the same question in mind: Is this what/who I want to wake up to every single day and have in my life as I take on the world? Just the same, we should ask ourselves if we’re giving our career and romantic partner what they need to in order to grow.

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